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Post by Graf von Krolock on Apr 9, 2008 20:20:17 GMT -5
"Well, of COURSE we can fly! Some simply choose not to." He said to himself.
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Post by Cal on Apr 1, 2009 12:55:37 GMT -5
**NEW DAY**
*Humming off-key, Cal moved about the castle entirely too cheerfully for a vampire, cleaning up the grime that always seemed to remain on the windows no matter how many times she cleaned them... and they were some big-ass windows, too.*
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Post by Prince Charming on Apr 1, 2009 13:18:56 GMT -5
He had been riding for many suns and moons.
Through the darkness of the Caves of Epic Scary, past the endless deeps of the Lake of Infite Depths, over the bridges with their fearsome keepers. It was he who would chance the perilous journey through blistering cold and scorching desert, traveling for many days and nights, risking life and limb, for he was the bravest, and most handsome in all the land, and it was destiny to rescue all damsels in distress!
And marry them and make sure they lived happily ever after... while dodging alimony and institutes that prosecuted you for polygamy... and saving even more princesses and such.
Now, after having successfully crossed through the terrible woods that surrounded the castle, he was there... late, but still he was there!
And it was he who would save the damsel awaiting him!
For he was Prince Charming!
Tying his beautiful white stallion to a nearby tree that would surely be convenient for riding off into the sunset - well, sunrise - later on, the handsome prince took the somewhat yellowed parchment out of his pocket.
Always nice to know who he was saving from what.
The prince brushed back a perfect lock that had been falling into his eyes in a rather charming manner before unfolding the letter and reading:
1st of April, 1679
Had Charming not been Prince Charming and therefore of all times, he might have done a double take at this... or at least remarked that he was really late. As it was, he read on.
Dear Prince Charming,
My father has me locked in my room and refuses to let me attend the ball! Please, please, please save me!
Love, H
Well, actually there was more to the letter than that... but Charming had by now received enough of such notes to just scan for the important bits.
This case seemed to be pretty straightforward, though. Beautiful girl locked in a castle by evil father, had to be saved in time for the ball... yeah, that would work.
Signing the letter with an initial was a nice touch, though. Gave things a bit of added mistery.
Tucking the letter back into his pocket, the prince walked up to the big castle, then looked up the sheer wall.
Oh crap.
The prince shook his head and made his hair dance beautifully before walking back to his horse to get a sturdy rope and grappling hook.
He then circled the part of the castle you could actually circle without falling off a cliff and to his delight spotted an open window. He threw the hook expertly and scaling the wall.
"Fear not, my fair maiden for thy prince is..." Charming began as he entered before looking at the lady who was at present cleaning. A Cinderella story as well? He hoped not... one wife with an OCD polishing everything was quite enough. His armor couldn't gleam any more.
"Are you my damsel?"
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Post by Cal on Apr 1, 2009 13:23:20 GMT -5
*Cal raised a dark eyebrow. Being only 5'0" on a good day, especially in cleaning shoes and not her hunting heels (the impracticality of hunting in heels was something she just dealt with; one could not tower over one's prey, or really even reach their neck, if one was short), she had to literally tip her head up to look at him. Her rag was removed from the window-pane and her weight shifted to one leg.*
"Are you selling something?" *She asked bluntly, careful to hide her fangs as she spoke.*
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Post by Prince Charming on Apr 1, 2009 13:29:03 GMT -5
"I shall take that as a 'no'."
Damsels, even those in a lot of distress, were usually more polite than this... at least until after the honeymoon.
"I am looking for a certain 'H'?" he gave the... maid, he supposed... an inquiring glance with his perfectly dreamy eyes.
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Post by Cal on Apr 1, 2009 13:34:53 GMT -5
"No H's here, sorry for your trouble." *She said, a little more politely this time. Taking the handkerchief she'd tied around her head (to keep her exuberant hair in check) off, she stuffed the rag in her apron.*
"I'm Calliope, so that's a C; we have a B and and an M" *She tapped her right index finger on an outspread finger from her left hand each time she mentioned an initial,* "but both are taken, and a J and an... ohh, we did have an H, but he's roughly six feet tall and currently living with a chubby former angel."
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Post by Prince Charming on Apr 1, 2009 13:44:23 GMT -5
"Well, still charmed to meet you."
Charming managed to overlook the 'he'-bit, mostly because there were always strange accents galore... and his own wishful thinking.
"No, no... I need someone who is being locked in a room and isn't allowed to go to the ball. See?"
He produced the letter once more and held it out to Calliope.
"It is clearly signed by an 'H' and I'm sure this is the right big, looming intimidating castle. I checked three times!" Though he didn't ask for directions... Prince Charming he might be, he was still a dude.
"As you might have been able to tell, dear lady, I am Prince Charming! This letter is evidence that somewhere in this castle there is a damsel in distress who requires rescuing, sweeping away, marriage and a happily ever after."
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Post by Cal on Apr 1, 2009 14:22:34 GMT -5
"... trust me, I'd know if there were any damsels who needed rescuing. I've cleaned every room in the house, and the Graf isn't the kind to keep captive damsels anyway. He's more the seducing type." *Cal explained, as one might to a younger child.* "I don't think there are any other looming castles around here, except for Dracula's, but he hasn't kidnapped a girl in a while, as far as I know."
*Of course, she was convinced he was insane. But there were plenty of crazy people in Paris, and this one seemed fairly harmless.*
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Post by Prince Charming on Apr 1, 2009 14:26:04 GMT -5
"Well, this note is very clear about the whole thing!"
Charming gave her the look of righteousness, a breeze coming out of nowhere to ruffle his hair in a heroic fashion.
"There is someone in need of rescue and I shall be her savior! For I am Prince Charming!"
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Post by Cal on Apr 1, 2009 15:20:36 GMT -5
*Cal took the note, moving supernaturally quickly so that he couldn't pull it out of her reach. She scanned it, frowning.*
"This note says 1679! It's 18--!"
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Post by Prince Charming on Apr 1, 2009 15:25:19 GMT -5
"Is it now?"
Well, that could be problematic.
"Then I guess I'm a bit late for the whole rescue thing..." He pouted in a somewhat pretty fashion, but then looked up at Cal, almost hopeful.
"Unless you're in need of being swept away? Drive off into the sunrise, that sort of thing?"
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Post by Cal on Apr 1, 2009 15:27:27 GMT -5
"I'm in a committed relationship. With another woman. We're both vampires." *She said simply.* "So no, considering even if I was free I'd burn to a cinder in said sunrise."
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Post by Prince Charming on Apr 1, 2009 15:32:14 GMT -5
"Oh, bummer... I did the whole 'riding for many suns and moons' thing, you know? Defying mortal danger, fighting my way through the perilous journey with wit, charm and great skill..." He made a pretty, but also pretty meaningless gesture.
"It's quite a shame to let all that go to waste, don't you think?" He tapped a foot on the floor and put on his 'I'm thinking but still handsome'-face.
"Nobody else in any possible need of rescue? Preferably sans combustion?"
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Post by Cal on Apr 1, 2009 15:35:06 GMT -5
"Oh, I'm sure you'll find someone in the city." *She suggested helpfully.* "It's quite large and disproportionately full of maidens in distress." *Given, sometimes she was the cause of said distress. A girl had to eat.* "And as long as you look during the day, you should do a good job of avoiding vampires."
*Normally, she'd eat him. Fops always tasted better; they took good care of themselves and ate good food. But she wasn't particularly hungry, and something about him was charming. In a you're-utterly-mad sort of way.
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Post by Prince Charming on Apr 1, 2009 15:39:36 GMT -5
"Well, I suppose I'd better leave, then... if there's nobody in need of rescue." He shrugged, perfect muscles rippling under his rather pompous outfit and then retrieved his grappling hook.
"Could you perhaps let me out through the door? This heroic business is all fine and dandy when called for, but scaling walls is really terrible for your shoes."
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