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Post by Alex on Sept 4, 2007 16:49:52 GMT -5
*Suddenly Alex feared she'd ruined everything. It wasn't exactly easy, the thoughts going through the other girl's head, and she knew that firsthand.*
"Sorry," *she said hurriedly.* "I'm sorry, I shouldn't..."
*She lifted her eyes from where they'd been trained on the carpet.*
"Don't hate me, Lizzie," *she said, her green eyes darkening to jade.* "Even if... even if you decide you can't deal with me, with... this... I couldn't bear it if you hated me."
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Post by Lizzie on Sept 4, 2007 17:06:51 GMT -5
*Lizzie's breath grew shallow for a moment, as if some word might escape that she couldn't bear to hear. Then in the softest of whispers, her voice slipped out once more.*
"I...I can't...I can't hate you, Alex."
*She pursed her lips tightly, as though she was angry at herself for some private thought.*
"I...I can't..."
*Resolve broken, she shied like a spooked horse, running from the room and leaving the chocolate-covered strawberries forgotten on the table in the parlor. She had to get away from...this. These feelings. She was so confused. She didn't even say goodbye to Rochester as she passed him on the way out the door, skirts swishing and bootheels clacking against the steps. She wasn't sure what to do, but she knew that she couldn't stay. Something...bad might happen.*
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Post by Alex on Sept 4, 2007 17:42:39 GMT -5
*Alex raced after her, but it was only her shock that had her at the door in an instant, calling after her. She held herself back, knowing the girl needed time. Needed... not to see her for awhile.
She wasn't doing this right at all.
She should probably let her go. Why did she want to drag a nice girl like her into the kind of life she had to lead? A life of deception and dissembling, even if she still wore a dress.
Alex slumped against the doorframe, then sighed and walked back inside. Her eyes lit on the box, which she opened. Chocolate-covered strawberries lay jumbled within, and somehow the sight was the saddest thing Alex had ever seen.
She picked one up, and ate it thoughtfully.*
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Post by Lizzie on Sept 4, 2007 17:45:00 GMT -5
((*hugs* I still love you Alex.))
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Post by Rochester on Sept 4, 2007 18:12:23 GMT -5
*Rochester knocked on the door frame to announce his presence to Alex.*
"Darling...what happened?"
*His face was etched with genuine concern.*
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Post by Alex on Sept 4, 2007 18:17:24 GMT -5
*Alex smiled at him, a pale, ironic shadow of her roguish grin.*
"You won't believe me, Rochester, but I'm having girl trouble."
*She flung herself sideways into an armchair, propping the open box on her stomach.*
"Seems I've come over all honest. Told the girl--Lizzie Quinn, from the party?--what I was. Am. And got what I deserved, naturally, for springing such a thing on her and actually caring what she felt. Anyway, she came back."
*Her eyes danced with muted amusement as she got to the best part.*
"To prove she only liked kissing boys."
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Post by Rochester on Sept 4, 2007 18:34:40 GMT -5
((*iz ded from a broken heart* I will not let Lizzie run back in and take Alex most indecently...I will not let Lizzie run back in and take Alex most indecently....))
*Rochester's heart ached in sympathy, forbidden lov--affections--were something he knew all too much about. He sat next to her.*
"Oh Alex, I'm so sorry."
*He tried to not chisel into the facade that Alex was so eager to put up.*
"Did it work? She didn't seem so convinced from the blur of her that I saw."
*He let out a short, muted laugh.*
"Although, you're a hard one to resist, if I do say so, as either gender."
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Post by Alex on Sept 5, 2007 9:37:39 GMT -5
*Alex wrinkled her freckled nose at him.*
"Flattery, my dear... But no, she did not seem at all convinced."
*She sighed.*
"Dunno why I felt the need to tell her in the first place. I mean... it suddenly seemed so dishonest."
*She ate another strawberry.*
"Must be going soft on you."
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Post by Rochester on Sept 5, 2007 10:57:02 GMT -5
*Rochester grinned and leaned over to pluck up one of her strawberries.*
"It happens to the best of us."
*He bit into the fruit, trying not to think about Shadi.*
"Although she must be something to have slain your libertine ideals. Tell me about her? I'm afraid I haven't had much time to get to know her."
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Post by Alex on Sept 5, 2007 11:18:11 GMT -5
*Alex shrugged.*
"It could be a phase, you know. It'd be awful to suddenly have a conscience. It's just that..."
*She trailed off. What was it?*
"I've never really... hurt anyone with my charade. Until now. People either knew, and didn't care, or didn't know and didn't care. But Lizzie..." *She smiled, picturing a sunny riverbank.* "I met her when she decided to go wading in the Seine. How can a girl resist that? And that little homegrown accent; she's quite fetching. A bit confused, I'll warrant, as well. Altogether, an intriguing package."
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Post by Rochester on Sept 5, 2007 11:24:50 GMT -5
*Rochester was quiet for a moment. It finally hit him how hard it must be for Alex, carrying herself as something she didn't have the equipment for. He pursed his lips, unsure of how to help.*
"It'll get better, you'll see. Women as a whole are quite resilient. She bounce back and come running right back here. Sometimes it just takes them a while to figure out what they want."
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Post by Alex on Sept 5, 2007 15:32:53 GMT -5
"Oh, I know," *she said, smiling up at him.* "I went through the same thing, of course. Maybe went a different way with it, but it's not like I don't know what it's like. I just... I'm not sure if I should have made her doubt the way she was. She might have gone her whole life not questioning it. Wouldn't that have been better?"
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Post by Rochester on Sept 5, 2007 17:24:28 GMT -5
*Rochester pursed his lips. It was a valid question. Sighing gently, he squeezed her hand.*
“I think that her life would have been different, yes. But is it truly so horrible, to live as we do? We bring happiness to so many, is there harm in the fact that it is fleeting? Is not the memory of a tryst even sweeter than the actual night?”
*He smiled and brushed back the hair from her face.*
“You may have confused her, but you will always be her first. And I have found that women most often remember those more fondly than most.”
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Post by Alex on Sept 5, 2007 17:35:53 GMT -5
*Alex smiled softly, looking rather womanly in the moment.*
"No, I doubt she'll forget," *she said, humor lending her voice an edge.* "Nor shall I; and I'll have that, anyway."
*She popped another strawberry in her mouth.*
"Enough moping! She'll come back, if she wants... In the meantime, how does your little charge?"
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Post by Rochester on Sept 5, 2007 17:46:48 GMT -5
*Rochester was a bit caught off guard by the topic shift and it made him ruffle his cravat nervously.*
“Oh…fine enough, as it were. Things are still…complicated.”
*His dimple peeked faintly. He leaned closer to whisper conspiratorially.*
“I find that I can’t escape her. She plagues me even when I try to sleep. Perhaps we both need a remedy for what ails us.”
*He bounced his brow suggestively.*
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