|
Post by Norman Bates on Aug 12, 2008 14:40:29 GMT -5
What was she doing? What was she thinking? After he'd... Her display of tenderness only made it worse.
"You should kill me," he said flatly. "Please. You don't understand. I never wanted this. Never asked to be... this way. What I did... it was unforgivable."
|
|
|
Post by Sarah von Krolock on Aug 12, 2008 14:46:34 GMT -5
*Sarah frowned at his back, unsure of how to right this. She slipped off the bed and moved around so she could kneel on the floor and face him, her eyes soft.*
"I don't want to kill you. I just...want to understand. I don't want either of us to be in pain."
*She smiled supportively.*
"I know that sometimes we can't help the way we are."
|
|
|
Post by Norman Bates on Aug 12, 2008 14:54:13 GMT -5
Norman grimaced. He knew that all too well--but it didn't make the truth any easier.
And the fact was, he'd been curable. Cured. Until this.
"Look. I may not have much time. And you may not believe me." His voice was barely above a whisper, his strength sapped. But it was the only thing that gave him, this him, license to speak up. "This is who I am. Who I want to be. This... I guess some might say I'm weak. But I'm nice. I really am. I just... there's something inside me that's wrong. I thought I had it beat, but this... this vampire thing brought it out again. I can't stop him, unless he's weakened to the point where I get the upper hand."
He smiled a little goofily.
"Don't know exactly what that means about me. Maybe I don't want to. Point is, I don't want to be him. But I'm not sure I have much choice, unless I'm weak enough to be completely useless. So... I might as well be dead. I'd do it myself, if I could. I worked hard--harder than you can know--to know myself again. To be the person I wanted. To stop hurting people. I'd do anything to keep him--myself--from doing it again."
He sighed and fell back, exhausted.
|
|
|
Post by Sarah von Krolock on Aug 12, 2008 15:20:55 GMT -5
*To be perfectly honest, Sarah didn't know what to think. It was just too much to take in at one time. Especially for someone as simple innocent as she was. This...she couldn't understand. But she wanted to. She wanted to try so hard. She stood and sat on the bed next to him, watching over him, touching the wound on his neck gently looking worried.*
"So...you want me to hurt you? When...you're like that?"
|
|
|
Post by Norman Bates on Aug 12, 2008 16:32:19 GMT -5
Norman gazed up at her, a little misty-eyed from blood loss. She looked so nice and pretty. And confused.
"I... I don't know," he said. "I don't see why you should care, after I... You can't very well just keep me drained of blood all the time so I don't hurt anyone. I don't know what else to do, other than... die. I'm sorry to put this all on you. You don't deserve it and I realize I'm making a terrible night even worse. And I'm sorry--I really am. But I had to take this chance to talk to someone. She... Maria... I love her. But she doesn't love me. Not like this."
|
|
|
Post by Sarah von Krolock on Aug 12, 2008 16:44:52 GMT -5
*Sarah listened quietly. As strange as it sounded, she almost understood what he was going through. This person she was now, neither one of her previous lovers could want. But...she still had the ability to care.*
"Then maybe she doesn't love the real you." *She muttered, pulling his lethargic form closer to her.*
"Please...let me care for you. I...I think I need it as much as I suspect you might." *She smiled hopefully.*
|
|
|
Post by Norman Bates on Aug 12, 2008 18:01:53 GMT -5
"Whether she does or not--and she did once, or part of her did--she's in agreement with the other me." It sounded crazy. "I sound crazy. You should know... I had this problem before I was a vampire. The split personality thing. I just thought I had it under control."
Now he controlled nothing, while his "other" self felt he controlled the world. He hated it. He hated himself. Even the self he liked, he hated, for being too weak to do anything about it. He stared at her, grateful and disgusted with himself and scared for her all at once.
"Caring for me is a losing proposition," he said quietly. "What will you do when I get some blood in me, or Maria comes looking for me, and the rest of me realizes what I've done?"
|
|
|
Post by Sarah von Krolock on Aug 13, 2008 7:32:46 GMT -5
*All perfectly valid points. And yet, Sarah couldn't find it in her to care. She'd been abandoned, locked away from everything she loved and wanted. And she wasn't about to just turn her back on someone in a similar situation. She sighed resolutely.*
"But what if it would make me happy to make you happy, even for a little while?"
*She tried to smile, though there was sadness in it.*
"It's...not like I have anything to lose at this point."
|
|
|
Post by Norman Bates on Aug 13, 2008 10:00:30 GMT -5
Norman thought back to what he'd tried, on this very bed.
"Oh, but you do," he murmured. Still, his hand reached out for hers. "I don't know what to tell you to do. I don't see a way out, besides..."
He was too weak to kill himself, both physically and... well, he was a coward.
|
|
|
Post by Sarah von Krolock on Aug 13, 2008 10:14:27 GMT -5
*Sarah squeezed his hand gently as she took it in her own. She questioned him gently, trying to be supportive.*
"Don't you even want to try? I mean...if you really want to kill yourself..."
*She frowned at the thought.*
"There is plenty of time to do it later."
|
|
|
Post by Norman Bates on Aug 13, 2008 10:58:51 GMT -5
"I suppose," he agreed. "But how many more must die before I decide I can't be allowed to do it anymore?" he wondered. "You're a nice person," he added. "Whoever it was who hurt you didn't deserve you."
|
|
|
Post by Sarah von Krolock on Aug 13, 2008 12:12:32 GMT -5
*Sarah chuckled mirthlessly.*
"Thank you. Though...I doubt they'd agree."
*She scooted onto the bed next to him, still holding his hand.*
"Though I think you're nice too. Under the other thing." *She tried to sound supportive.*
|
|
|
Post by Norman Bates on Aug 13, 2008 12:25:29 GMT -5
Norman grimaced.
"Others would not agree," he said. "In fact... you could argue they're both me. I've just... compartmentalized myself into two people, one of them decent and wholly ineffectual, the other living out what are probably my own fantasies. You shouldn't think too highly of me. I'm not blameless, here."
((He sounds a little smarter than he does in the film, but I figure that's because he's been through analysis.))
|
|
|
Post by Sarah von Krolock on Aug 13, 2008 12:56:54 GMT -5
((Makes sense to me. I figure he was there for a while.))
*Sarah lifted her chin to look down her nose at him.*
"I hardly said blameless."
*Her face lowered, her eyes soft.*
"But does that mean that we don't deserve another chance?"
|
|
|
Post by Norman Bates on Aug 13, 2008 13:24:27 GMT -5
Norman looked away.
"I had another chance," he said quietly. "And this is what I made of it..."
His eyes sought hers again.
"Eventually I'll become too hungry, and I'll feed, and he--the other me--will come back. What do you suggest we do?"
|
|