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Post by Erik on Oct 8, 2007 21:02:23 GMT -5
"Erik doubts they wish to see him ever again. At least, that seems to be the current attitude."
*He stepped closer.*
"Erik sought you, Julian. He... I can feel your wounds, though I do not entirely understand their cause."
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Post by Julian on Oct 8, 2007 21:04:57 GMT -5
*Julian's jaw tightened. He was torn between wanting to run, to flee the pain in his heart and wanting to embrace Erik, to find comfort in him.*
"I...am sorry that I have pained you. I did not know..."
*He pursed his lips.*
"I did it for her...to make her...happy."
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Post by Erik on Oct 8, 2007 21:08:06 GMT -5
*Erik waved an elegant hand.*
"It does not hurt. Erik only knows of it. But why did you not say before? Her nose... the things you can do... Erik yearns to hear of them."
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Post by Julian on Oct 8, 2007 21:10:17 GMT -5
*Julian looked back to Erik, his eyes glistening.*
"What did you want to know? I figured....such things are not beyond your mastery."
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Post by Erik on Oct 8, 2007 21:12:01 GMT -5
*Erik felt a twinge of regret at letting his son down.*
"No, he cannot do these things. My magic, Julian, is all here."
*He pointed to his head.*
"Your origins must play some part in that."
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Post by Julian on Oct 8, 2007 21:15:17 GMT -5
*Julian nodded somberly.*
"That it must."
*He stood and cautiously approached Erik, as if he was worried he might spook him. He lifted his hand to touch Erik's chest tenderly above his heart.*
"It comes from here."
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Post by Erik on Oct 8, 2007 21:17:41 GMT -5
*There was something like a shock when Julian touched him, a circuit completed.*
"You are a marvel, Julian," *he said softly.* "Erik is sorry you are unhappy."
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Post by Julian on Oct 8, 2007 21:20:01 GMT -5
*Julian lowered his eyes, but not his hand, laying the palm flat against his chest.*
"I...am sorry that I make you unhappy. It is because of me that...things are complicated for you."
*His lips quivered slightly as he whispered to himself.*
"Poor, unhappy Erik."
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Post by Erik on Oct 8, 2007 21:26:16 GMT -5
*Erik shuddered, whether at the touch or the quoted words he did not know.*
"No. It is not you. It is... everything that is hard. But it was never easy, Julian. Surely you know that? Life is sorrow. You only pain me in how little I can give you. How... complicated my life has become. But it is not your fault."
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Post by Julian on Oct 8, 2007 21:31:32 GMT -5
*Julian met Erik's eyes sharply, drawing his hand back.*
"Oh? Is it so? So tell me...if I were not burdening you...would you not leave Megan and her get and take Christian to be your own? It seems the simple solution. She obviously has issues with you...and well...Christian has forsworn all others to be with you."
*He spat the last words.*
"He wants only you. I...I am the complication. That which denies you love without consequence. Freedom. Me. I bind you here."
*The tears started to fall and he turned away to hide them.*
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Post by Pina on Oct 8, 2007 21:35:45 GMT -5
((*hugs*))
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Post by Erik on Oct 8, 2007 21:40:58 GMT -5
*Erik impulsively grasped Julian by the shoulders.*
"Why would you say that? Erik is not coy with his feelings! And what have you to do with Megan and the child? What does your coming or going mean to them? Nothing, Julian--if Erik wished to be alone--if he wished to spirit Christian away, he could do so. In a trice. The fact that he does not... Well, I don't know what it means. You... you confound me, Julian. I know when you enter or leave a room, not by my senses but here."
*He touched the place on his chest Julian had so recently vacated.*
"I... I feel you, and I feel your loss. I don't know what to make of you. I don't know what you are and yet... You are the only person who knows Erik."
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Post by Julian on Oct 8, 2007 21:46:46 GMT -5
*Julian's body sagged slightly at the contact. It was so welcome, no matter how much he fought against for the desire of it. He shut his eyes and lowered his face. His words fell softly.*
"Then...know me."
*There was a childlike innocence in them, a desperate need to be understood, to belong. His back hurt and his chest ached.*
"Please...let me be always near you..."
*His lips quivered slightly as his head extended towards Erik, as if seeking to nuzzle against him.*
"Don't choose him. Don't leave me alone. I...I know that you will not turn him away, but..."
*Fresh tears slipped over old paths on his cheeks.*
"I need you. With me. To...complete me."
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Post by Erik on Oct 8, 2007 22:00:02 GMT -5
*The words made sense to him, even if he didn't understand fully what it meant. It seemed to slide something into place, some piece of the puzzle that was Julian. Because Erik felt empty without him.
He still didn't know what that meant.*
"Julian, I cannot... I cannot send him away. You know what I felt for Christine, what she meant for Erik. What Christian represents... But neither can he cut you out of himself.
"I don't want to leave you. But I don't... I don't know what to do."
*He said the last part desperately, as if he hoped Julian could find that answer for him.*
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Post by Julian on Oct 8, 2007 22:07:24 GMT -5
*Julian nodded, his eyes safely averted. He did know. He was not unaffected by Christine. Or Christian. But this...this was Mother. He swallowed gently, stretching his neck ever further, desperate for contact. He blinked as he processed, trying to solve this great riddle.*
"I know...that you cannot be without him. But...just...be with me too. Please?"
*His eyes darted to Erik's, pleading. His face was so close that Erik could feel the warm breath on his lips, although his words were faint.*
"Please...Erik. Choose me...if only for a little while."
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