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Post by Vianne Giry on Aug 8, 2007 16:13:48 GMT -5
*Vianne's red cheeks were rivalled only by Erik's as she bit her lip.*
"I...it was...it was as much my own fault, as..."
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Post by Erik on Aug 8, 2007 16:19:45 GMT -5
*Erik shook his head vehemently.*
"No. I've been... thinking. I see my error was in... indulging my own pain while you required my assistance. You never approved of the habit, Madame, and Erik chose a despicable time to regain it."
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Post by Vianne Giry on Aug 8, 2007 17:01:10 GMT -5
"I did not approve, Erik, but now...oh, now I understand. When the pain one feels is so great that anything is preferable to simply lying awake and being aware of nothing but the pain..."
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Post by Severus Snape on Aug 8, 2007 17:03:43 GMT -5
((It's no problem, and Snape only reads them when he wants to, of which I've determined is all the time. Have fun!))
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Post by Erik on Aug 8, 2007 17:10:51 GMT -5
((Thanks. And that means Snape can make plenty of trouble. Good.))
*He stared at her, surprise at her words overriding his need to look anywhere but.*
"Surely, Madame, you cannot mean you."
*He cast his mind back, and remembered all she'd been through.*
"We are not the same people we were," *he said sadly.* "Even so, I fear I have abused your trust in me past endurance."
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Post by Vianne Giry on Aug 8, 2007 17:15:16 GMT -5
"And when I freed you...brought you here from...where I found you...in that cage..." *she shuddered.* "Did not I first rescue you, only to leave you here in darkness, with only the opium for a friend? I should have done more for you, then..."
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Post by Erik on Aug 8, 2007 17:28:10 GMT -5
*Erik slumped against the door, his tall, thin frame seeming to collapse in on itself, and laughed bitterly.*
"And you, with that bastard of a husband and a child to care for. Erik was more than anyone should have to deal with, alone."
*But that was exactly what he'd asked of Christine.*
"Erik was not your responsibility. You were mine, while you resided here, and I betrayed you."
And I... I liked it.
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Post by Vianne Giry on Aug 8, 2007 17:30:22 GMT -5
*She smiled, but there was no warmth in it.*
"Do not trouble yourself about it, Erik. It makes no difference to anyone, now."
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Post by Erik on Aug 8, 2007 17:36:05 GMT -5
*Erik looked up and pushed himself away from the wall, eyes blazing.*
"Of course it makes a difference!" *he said hotly.* "You do not understand. I cannot trust myself! It's here--" *he clenched a fist near his gut* "--all the time, and I cannot stop it. A new face, and I cannot let myself around humanity for fear I am no better than the old men who give sweets to the petits rats--no better than your husband!"
*He stopped in the middle of the room, breathing heavily.*
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Post by Vianne Giry on Aug 8, 2007 17:48:26 GMT -5
*She shook her head, her own eyes dark with some unnamed fury. Her voice was low, her tone even, her words almost faint, but they held an undercurrent of steel that would be shaken by nothing.*
"Never...never compare your conduct with his. You may not love me, Erik, but you have never laid a hand on me out of hatred."
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Post by Erik on Aug 8, 2007 17:57:37 GMT -5
*Erik's eyes met hers--clouded sky met with steel.*
"No," *he said slowly.* "I have not. But I have misused you. I may have the capacity only ever to love one woman; but I have ever desired your good opinion. My conduct of late does not recommend me."
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Post by Vianne Giry on Aug 8, 2007 18:19:11 GMT -5
*Vianne shrugged, wrapping her arms about her knees.*
"You were good to me, in your own way, Erik. What's done is done. We must face it and move on."
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Post by Erik on Aug 8, 2007 18:21:49 GMT -5
*Erik had two problems with that plan: the facing it and the moving on. But he could try.*
"Then... you do not hate me?"
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Post by Vianne Giry on Aug 9, 2007 9:38:57 GMT -5
"If I did not hate you for anything you have done thus far, I should not hate you for what happened. And I do not."
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Post by Erik on Aug 9, 2007 11:12:54 GMT -5
*Erik felt a wave of relief, shameful in its intensity, wash over him.*
"Thank you," *he murmured. The guilt still remained in that treacherous part of him which did not want her forgiveness because he did not regret it at all. But he had long ago learned to compartmentalize his emotions, or go mad.*
"What can I do for you, Madame?"
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