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Post by Cry Baby on Aug 4, 2008 11:11:20 GMT -5
His heart went out to her and Cry-Baby seemed to fall in love with her all over again. This was not the girl she'd been in past months. And while he loved her strong and capable and able to take him down a peg, it was this Brandi who made him realize that she still needed him.
"How can you ask that?" he asked softly. "Stood by you, haven't I? Never regretted you one minute. I'm just afraid... of what I'll do. When I can't help myself. Keep thinkin' maybe I should go away until I can... until I'm not a danger to you."
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Post by Brandi on Aug 4, 2008 11:24:49 GMT -5
*Brandi looked relieved for one bittersweet moment, but then her brow arched in worry. She kissed him gently, a chaste kiss on the corner of his mouth. One of promise.*
"I worry, Baby. And I'm sorry. I've always been grateful to have you next to me, helping me. I...understand what you're saying."
*Her eyes fell, her voice starting to tremble slightly.*
"I...I want you to know that I support you too. In...whatever you need to do. And..."
*The words grew harder, but she forced herself to continue.*
"And if this is...what you need..."
*She squeezed his hand, trying to steady herself.*
"Please..." *She breathed.* "Just come back to me. When you can. I always want you here."
*Her eyes glistened and were speckled red when she lifted them up to his with a pained smile.*
"I love you, Wade. And nothing is ever going to change that."
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Post by Cry Baby on Aug 4, 2008 14:38:59 GMT -5
He kissed her forehead, his lips lingering for a moment.
"Wish I could believe there was nothin' I could do that would change that," he said sadly. "But there's somethin' in me, whether it's my own influence or not. Like I gotta do something bad every day, only it ain't like it used to be. When it was fun."
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Post by Brandi on Aug 4, 2008 16:07:54 GMT -5
*Brandi leaned forward, urging her skin against his lips.*
"I know, Baby." *She whispered.* "I know. And...I'm sorry. For...making you..."
*Was this her fault? She wasn't sure anymore.*
"...for making it worse by being around."
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Post by Cry Baby on Aug 4, 2008 16:59:32 GMT -5
"Nah. Ain't your fault. Wouldn't have anything without you. Didn't have nothing' worth singin' about."
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Post by Brandi on Aug 4, 2008 17:06:50 GMT -5
*Brandi exhaled sharply, trying to force back her urge to cry with something that resembled a smile.*
"I..."
*She shut her eyes, trying to compose herself.*
"Where will you go?" *She managed to whisper, her gaze lifting with a sniffle. She was trying to be strong for him.*
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Post by Cry Baby on Aug 4, 2008 17:59:39 GMT -5
Cry-Baby stared down at her with pain in his expression. He didn't want to go. At all. But what choice did he have? What was left of him.
"Don't know," he said at last. "Try to find someplace lonely, I reckon. Outta the way."
It hurt, forcing the words out. The decision to go, which he'd hardly made and already felt like a weight around his neck.
But he couldn't hurt her anymore.
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Post by Brandi on Aug 4, 2008 18:14:55 GMT -5
"How...how long?" *Brandi whispered, realizing the stupidity as soon as it was out. She shook her head, lowering her face.*
"Course. Can't know that. Sorry. Just..."
*Her lashes fluttered as she looked around the room, the tears starting to peek from the corners of her eyes.*
"If you ever want...need...anything...just come back. Come back here."
*She nodded at the nursery in general.*
"It'll be our safe haven. And..." *She forced a smile, trying to tell herself this was the right thing.*
"I will wait for you."
*Why couldn't he just be holding her forever?*
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Post by Cry Baby on Aug 4, 2008 18:24:47 GMT -5
Cry-Baby felt unmanly tears sting his eyes and he blinked them back.
"Don't wanna go, baby," he said hoarsely. "Just don't know what else to do. Won't ever leave you. Not for good."
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Post by Brandi on Aug 4, 2008 18:33:27 GMT -5
((Carlos? ![;)](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/wink.png) You are busy, girl. But thanks for the effort.)) *Her smile came easier at his promise, but still...who knew how long it would be? But he was worth it. She knew that without question, but it was still a hard thing to face. Brandi lifted her free hand to his cheek, cradling it gently.* "Thank you, Baby. Hearing you say that...makes it easier." *She kissed him gently. God, his lips felt so good. She sighed softly against him.* "As easy as it can be." *She swallowed. She could do this, be a rock for him. Strong, waiting.* "When?" *She finally managed.*
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Post by Cry Baby on Aug 5, 2008 9:11:07 GMT -5
((LOL. Yeah, too many C-names.))
He didn't know his heart could break without actually losing her. But he felt almost worse about this than he did about the prospect of hurting her...
Then he recalled her huddled against the wall as he... and she... He couldn't face that again. He couldn't face her back as she turned from him in bed.
"Soon, I reckon. Don't wanna leave time for somethin' to happen. I'd stay here, get another room, but somehow I don't think that'd work. Wouldn't be able to keep away from you. You'll be okay? With the kids?"
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Post by Brandi on Aug 5, 2008 9:41:32 GMT -5
*Brandi's heart was aching something terrible. But she did what she could to keep her chin up. What he was doing...what he felt he had to do...it was going to be hard enough without her being all tears and begging him to stay. No matter how much she wanted it.*
"We'll manage." *She forced with a precarious smile.* "I'll find a way, Baby."
*Her eyes fell shut, trying to stay strong. She took a breath and opened them again.*
"You too, ok? Be safe."
*Her lips trembled as she tried to find the words.*
"I'll...be here. When you're ready. To be home again."
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Post by Cry Baby on Aug 5, 2008 10:26:24 GMT -5
Cry-Baby grimaced.
"Sorry, baby," he whispered. "I'm so sorry. I'll be back. I promise."
He was still for a moment when suddenly he chuckled mirthlessly.
"Don't wanna go, just yet."
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Post by Brandi on Aug 5, 2008 10:35:32 GMT -5
*Brandi sighed gently, taking his hand again and nuzzling against him.*
"Then don't. Stay as long as you can."
*She glanced to a chest against the wall.*
"I could...set out some blankets on the floor. We could just sit for a while. With her."
Kinda like that night out back.
*She glanced down at Bebe that was gnawing her finger raw.*
"Though...if it wouldn't be too..."
*She shrugged.*
"Maybe you could make with the blankets and I could feed her?"
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Post by Cry Baby on Aug 5, 2008 11:10:07 GMT -5
Cry-Baby smiled gratefully.
"Yeah. Think I can manage."
When he handed Bebe to Brandi and uncoupled, there was a slight tingle, like a charge building. But it was muted; he felt different, but not out of control. Still, he noted with as much detachment as he could muster that there was a sort of cloud, a filter, between him and the world when he was like this. It was noticeable now, with the contrast.
He shook his head and retrieved the blankets from a closet, spreading them between the cribs. He glanced carefully over at Brandi feeding Bebe, and to his relief he felt under control. There was just an... undercurrent when he wasn't touching them.
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