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Post by Death on Apr 20, 2007 13:53:21 GMT -5
*Death set down the glass without emptying it and looked up to him apologetically.*
“I’m sorry, that was unfair of me. But everyone’s been riding my back recently. I guess I’m just paranoid.”
*He sighed heavily.*
“But…it seems pointless. Have you ever met Satan? He…I mean she…is the master of contracts. Fine print and technicalities. Vianne wouldn’t be in Hell if she wasn’t supposed to be. At least…I am assuming that Satan has some stake in it. It’s just…mistakes this big don’t happen, right? I can’t imagine…an innocent? In Hell? What are the odds of that one?”
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Post by meta on Apr 20, 2007 14:00:19 GMT -5
*Metatron snorted into his glass.*
"Never underestimate the human race's ability to majorly screw themselves over on the smallest detail. And, hey, the son of God got crucified--you bet your boots an innocent could end up in Hell. It probably happens more often that you'd think."
*he sighed.*
"I know Satan can be somewhat..."...tempestuous?" "Heinous bitch is the term used most often." difficult to work with. But I've known Luci since the old days--before she was famous. If she gives you any major trouble...well, I can help sort it out."
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Post by Death on Apr 20, 2007 14:02:46 GMT -5
*Death looked confused.*
“But wait…didn’t you just say…isn’t this something that I have to do without you?”
*The tequila wasn’t helping this plan make sense. It was probably good he stopped while he was ahead.*
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Post by meta on Apr 20, 2007 14:06:08 GMT -5
"I only said I can't go into Hell and do the negotiating myself. Satan roams the earth--I can talk to her here. Middle ground. It's not like she'd be allowed to stagger up to Heaven for a chat, even if she wanted to."
*Metatron leaned back and called over the bar boy.*
"Cup of coffee for this gentleman, please," *he said, gesturing to Death as he reached out and placed the remaining full shot glasses on the boy's tray to be taken away.*
"We're going to need you to have at least a nodding acquaintance with sobriety if we're going to pull this off, capisce?"
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Post by Death on Apr 20, 2007 14:09:46 GMT -5
*Death swallowed audibly (although how and why remained unclear) before looking sheepishly to Metatron.*
“So…you want me to go…now? I mean, shouldn’t there be a plan or something? I don’t even know what to say other than ‘hey, there was a goof, which by the way was totally not my fault, can I have that one back?’ I’m sure that’ll go over real well.”
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Post by meta on Apr 20, 2007 14:12:52 GMT -5
*Metatron shrugged.*
"Well you could always try. For all the trouble and glee Satan gets out of humans lying to each other, she really appreciates honesty and upfrontness. Look, I can give her a call right now and let her know you're coming."
*Metatron took a simple black RAZR from his pocket and flipped it open, hitting the code to dial 666.*
"Really, it's almost not worth having on speed-dial," *he muttered as he listened to it ring.*
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Post by Death on Apr 20, 2007 14:23:05 GMT -5
*Death sat nervously, debating with himself. This still seemed like an incredibly stupid idea. Was it really worth everything for one innocent soul? But Death suddenly realized that it was more than just that. It was getting him off the couch and back in bed with Demiselle. It was proving to both sides that he could do his job. In theory, clearing up an oversight of that magnitude would earn him points with both, right? He looked up to Metatron and nodded silently as the phone rang. He could do this. He hoped he could at least.*
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Post by meta on Apr 20, 2007 14:47:03 GMT -5
((So now we're waiting for Satan to pick up or should Metatron just talk his end of the conversation?))
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Post by Death on Apr 20, 2007 14:52:45 GMT -5
((Either way is fine with me.))
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Post by meta on Apr 20, 2007 14:55:16 GMT -5
((I'm knocking together a bit of lunch at the moment, before I go to work, so if Satan hasn't replied by the time I'm done making the Kraft Dinner (I need to go shopping. I buy good food in small amounts.) then Metatron will just start talking.))
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Post by Death on Apr 20, 2007 15:08:17 GMT -5
((You can also leave her a message. ))
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Post by meta on Apr 20, 2007 15:16:45 GMT -5
((Is cardboard dangerous if ingested? Because I just swallowed something definitely not macaroni and I'm hoping that cardboard is the least-harmful option. Also feeling kind of gaggy at the moment.))
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Post by Death on Apr 20, 2007 15:19:25 GMT -5
((You should be ok. Paper is normally harmless in general. But if you're really worried, call Poison Control.))
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Post by meta on Apr 20, 2007 15:21:00 GMT -5
((Well, I just don't know what it WAS. Cardboard is the most likely option, really. And texture-wise it was just...I dunno. Weird. Now I'm all cough-y and trying to suppress the gaggage.))
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Post by Death on Apr 20, 2007 15:25:09 GMT -5
((I'm sorry. You could try to induce vomiting if you're feeling gaggy anyways. I don't know what else to tell you.))
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